What Parents Don't Know About College

Don't shoot the messenger!

Parents often think that colleges offer special education classes, with adapted curriculum, similar to high school offerings. Some assume that they can call professors and have them change requirements for their students. They might believe that their child will continue to enjoy certain rights guaranteed by IDEA and still have an IEP plan. They’ve heard rumors that staff will monitor their student’s activities, and the college will assign an aide to accompany their student in class. 

Sadly, none of that is true. 

Parents are also uninformed about their students’ high school education. They frequently believe that their students’ grades are an indication of their academic preparation. Schools give As to students in special education classes; Students, who can’t read or do math on grade level, end up on the honor roll. Parents don’t understand grade inflation. 

High school teachers and administrators know about the challenges of college for students with disabilities, but don’t tell parents sometimes for altruistic reasons. Teachers and staff tell me that parents should stay happy for as long as possible. After high school, parents will be in a super tough position with few great options for students, teachers think, so there’s no point in worrying about them now. 

Some teachers and staff don’t correct false assumptions because they want to avoid miserable IEP meetings. Upset parents are litigious parents. It’s so much easier to let parents think that a student is doing great and will attend the same colleges as other kids in town. Once they learn that things aren’t great, they will be far away from the school. 

So, who has to share the bad news with parents? Me. I guess I could continue to spin the myths and make a nice profit doing it. I see other consultants doing that. But that’s not me.

I’m honing my delivery of the bad news. Like a doctor, I objectively tell parents the facts and move on. At first, I was mad that these parents were in this terrible position, and I would let my anger and frustration leak into the conversation. I’m much cooler about it now. After I tell them the hard truths, we can get into a good discussion about other options and alternative paths.

The Hard Truth

When I’m chatting with parents, I explain that college professors have different training and responsibilities from high school teachers. Professors are not education experts. Most have never taken a class in pedagogy or child development, and certainly have no training in autism. Instead, professors are experts in Shakespeare, differential calculus, and Ancient Greek history. The college expects them to teach for a few hours a week, sit in a bunch of meetings, and write many research papers. 

Professors will not alter their curriculum in any way for students with special needs. The class will be taught exactly how it is described in the syllabus. Parents cannot write to the professor or call them to discuss the student’s progress. They really don’t want to know about an individual student’s diagnoses or particular issues. 

Most faculty will only be physically on campus for two or three days per week. The rest of the week, they work at home in an attic office that smells like gym socks and old coffee. So, your student can’t just walk into their office for a chit-chat at any time. Instead, professors have a weekly office hour, where students can show up to ask questions. 

Tangent: I highly recommend that all students attend office hours at least once a semester. If the professor gets to know your name, it can boost a grade from a B to B+. 

Professors don’t have a boss. They do their stuff. If they don’t do their stuff, then they don’t get tenure. Once they get tenure, they can choose to do their stuff or not do their stuff. Most professors are paid less than your local gym teacher, so don’t judge them. 

Public schools may be imperfect, but they are legally obliged to teach all students. College is considered optional in our country. There is no right to a college education. And as much as the world gives lip service to inclusion, the majority of college faculty and administrators still believe that students must be “college material.” (Yuck.) 

Students must be able to blend into a regular college classroom or lecture hall. They must be able to sit in a chair for one to three hours, take notes, pay attention, participate in class, with all verbal tics and stims under control. A handful of special college programs provide peer mentors to accompany the student to class, but professors aren’t thrilled with any disturbances.

Most colleges have Offices of Disability services, which provide extra time on tests and a quiet room to take the tests. They might set up a standing appointment at the tutoring center. Students must be responsible for registering with this department, which could take several appointments and paperwork. Then they will be responsible for forwarding the “accommodations letter” to each of their professors.

How Do Neurodiverse Students Fit Into That Reality?

The standard college campus, as I’ve described it, probably doesn’t sound like a super autism-friendly environment. But this system actually works really well for some flavors of autism. For a person who is really passionate about a particular interest and can mask some autistic characteristics, a college campus is heaven. If you look around at the faculty members in the physics, engineering, and computing departments, you’ll see a whole lot of autism. 

In addition, there are new college programs opening up right now, aimed at different brands of autistic students. The trick is to match up your student’s autism flavor with these programs. If your student has an intellectual disability, great social skills, and few behaviors, then can explore the many I/DD programs available on college campuses. The Think College website has those options. Other programs are aimed at students, who can complete the academic work, but need social support.

Community colleges are becoming the default college for autistic students. 80 percent of college-bound students with autism attend a community college at some point in their college career. Picking up my son from his community college this week, I noticed that half the students waiting out the Campus Center looked just like him. And community colleges are responding with new programs aimed just at these students. 

His local community college has one program aimed at students who can manage the typical classwork. They provide peer mentors to act as buddies during lunch time, and offer support during the registration process. They also have a program with students with intellectual disabilities. The programs aren’t perfect, because the staff is still learning how to provide those services and the state never funds community colleges adequately. 

Not all students with autism can be managed by these new programs. Most colleges can’t handle nonverbal students, students with behavioral issues, or students that require significant oversight. They expect a lot of independence even from the students with intellectual disabilities.

Takeaways

The standard four-year college might not be right for every student with autism or another disability. But that doesn’t mean that college should be off the table entirely. Instead, parents should look at all the options to find one that works well for their student. 

Parents should guide their students to start slowly. The student could enroll in one online class for the first semester, just to get the feeling of how college works. Some transition programs will bus the students to the community college and then provide some academic support. There are several ways to put training wheels on the college experience. 

Parents should get a reliable recent evaluation of academics, behaviors, and functional ability to help guide their decisions. If your student isn’t able to handle the independence of a dorm and traditional college campus, then a local program would be better. If your student isn’t ready for the academic rigor of college, then maybe a program that is more experiential would be better. 

College may seem harsh as I first described it, but it’s also a unique place. It’s a community of young people learning things, eating together in dining halls, and hanging out in the student union. Outside of the college campus, life is more isolated. If college is a possibility, parents should explore all the options.

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Last Notes

Pictures: Me, Princeton University

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