TIL

Everything that I learned today (and over the past two weeks)

One of my favorite text/slang is TIL or Today I Learned. In the midst of the social decay that occupies just about everything related to social media, TIL is a 100% positive. It’s all about the surprise and wonder about running into new information and then pausing for a moment to appreciate that new bit of wisdom.

Even though I started preparing Ian for independence two and half years ago, I’m still learning new things. This week’s newsletter is about everything that I learned today (and over the past two weeks) about helping him make The Great Leap.

1. I thought I knew everything about local college opportunities. However, at a local Transition Fair (you MUST go to your local fairs), I stumbled into a brand new program at the local community college that is perfect for my son. It will provide him with the “home base” at the community college. He’ll get peer mentors to support him at college functions. This program is aimed at young people, who can take regular college classes.

2. I learned that this college received a new government grant to set up this program, which just started this semester. There is more and more money getting pumped into special programs at community college. All good news for kids like ours.

3. I learned that there is a large audience for my thorough — some might say obsessive -- research on local programs for my son. So, I’m creating a new company that will share this information. That’s fun!

4. I learned that local political leaders like to be seen as “Autism Friendly,” so they’ll help out with the creation of new programs, if you can provide them with a photo-op. Storing away that fun fact for the future.

5. I learned about yet another pot of state money to support families caring for disabilities. (For Jersey people, it’s called PPP.) I started that paperwork this week. When we’re done, Ian will be receiving services from three separate state bureaucracies and one federal bureaucracy.

Parenting is one giant learning curve. My oldest kid is 24, and I still haven’t quit parenting him yet (even though he doesn’t entirely appreciate that fact).

With kids on the spectrum or any differences, we can never stop advocating for them, supporting them, and watching them thrive. They need us. So, we must constantly be getting smarter and making new connections. I’ve found that this work is best achieved in small, manageable, bits of information. To avoid burnout, we can only consume little information bites at one time. And later, after you acquire that little bit of information, it’s good to celebrate that newfound knowledge and share it with friends.

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Pep Talk

On Monday, I attended a Sensory-Inclusive Night at a local restaurant in town. Organized by the local parents’ group, it was an amazing night to give those kids and families a chance to eat in a restaurant without fear of judgement and with fewer sensory demands.

First of all, yay to progress. The public has become so much more aware of families that need extra support. I love that my community is trying to be more accepting of people with differences, even if progress sometimes doesn’t always come fast enough for me.

Secondly, my son had some restaurant challenges over the years. Not huge ones, but we did have to make adjustments to our evening plans to make sure that he would always be successful. Watching those families with younger kids, I remembered those tougher times. Things get easier, everyone. Really.